The Creative's Dilemma: Ambition Overload with Motivation Depletion

This is my constant state of being. I have desire without execution; ideas without plans; ambition without motivation. Perhaps that’s why even this post has taken me the better part of a week and a half to complete. Is it paralysis, procrastination, perfectionism? Perhaps. However, I’ve come across some alarming beliefs that exist in the creative community and society at large that contribute substantially to this push-pull state of ambitious overloading met with a distinct lack of motivation to see any of that ambition through. 

The Glorification of Productivity

Hustle culture, productivity hacks and micromanaging are all thinly veiled tricks to glorify productivity, and we all fall prey to them every now and again. Creatives in particular can be especially vulnerable to these narratives because we already feel so rebellious by choosing to pursue something that feels playful, indulgent, fun. To justify why our creativity deserves to be taken as seriously as a traditional day job we latch onto productivity as a way to legitimize creativity as a way to make a living, as a thing we can shamelessly commit our time and resources to. What creativity has that other traditional forms of work and hobby don’t have is the necessity of doing nothing - daydreaming, problem solving, reworking, planning. All of these moments, all of these tasks that look like nothing are essential pieces of the creative process. They do not produce anything, they do not create products to share or show. It is written into the fabric of our society that to be useful we must be productive. But the definition of productivity in relation to work and time has not evolved to encompass all that we now have access to an agency to engage with. Creativity combats the myth that burnout is a badge of honour or a point of pride. It asks us to reevaluate what being productive really means in our lives and how much energy, effort, and time we allow productivity to take. At what point does being productive become living ata deficit? How can we bring meaning making back into the process of productivity? And in the process of doing so, are we creating a system that is not just more sustainable, but actually more effectively productive? 

The Demonization of Rest

Hand in hand with hustle culture narratives and the myth of productivity is the propaganda surrounding rest in a work obsessed society. This is where creatives are hurt the most. There is a lie circulating that if we don’t work like everyone else, if we devote time to slow, soulful pursuits, to spending time pondering beauty or filling our cups we are leaning into a life of laziness, sinful sloth. Rest has become demonized and when creativity is held synonymous with slowness it is damaging to those who make it a life practice. Creativity demands rest. It requires periods of doing very little, of stepping out of the flow of chaos and into a state of intentionality. Burnout is placed on a pedestal and any pace that isn’t changing that outcome is chastised, shamed, and shunned. When we rest, magic happens; we sink into ourselves and become more settled in who we are and clear in the vision of our lives, our work, and our peace. This threatens traditional work models that keep us exhausted, striving, and always falling short. Rest satisfies us. When we can achieve it, when we build it into our creative practice in work, hobby, or lifestyle we combat a system that is built on the myth that rest is laziness and exhaustion is a sign of morality. The creative is unique because, although there are more conversations happening about work-life balance and affordable vacations, creatives dare to say we can build practices and lives on the principle of operating from a place of rest, from a nest that promotes being rested and grounded in peace rather than chaos and exhaustion. It is a system that leaves us unable to fully engage with creativity because it is work, it is effort, it is energy consuming at the same time that it is life giving, and it is a practice we cannot fully invest in from a place of depletion. It keeps us small, timid, and tired. Afraid to take up space from a place of life giving rest instead of life draining burnout. How do we start to shift the narrative surrounding rest from one of divisive morality to one of collective necessity? Can injecting creativity into the already packed day of traditional work create adequate space for rest to rejuvenate our society? And if it does, how does that change the way artists and creatives take up space in the world as leaders? 

The Pressure to Perform

Outside of traditional work society has woven a web of deceit, claiming attention equates to value and insists that being visible is necessary for progress. Social media platforms that profit off of the backs of content creators and other creative pursuits, small businesses, and communities insist that visibility, likes, comments, virality is essential to establishing legitimacy as creatives. This pressure to constantly perform, prove, push our creativity to be accessible to others at a constant pace is not only unrealistic, but it devalues the sanctity of our authenticity. The pressure we feel to perform our lives, our practice, our creativity for the consumption of these platforms with the promise of reaching an audience, forming connection, and joining community perpetuates the myths of productivity and rest while profiting off the anxieties and insecurities of creatives (of everyone really). When our practice - whether for hobby, business,self care, or passion - begins to be driven by the need to perform it becomes an imitation, a forced version of what we feel called to do. Content creation is an incredible form of creative expression, as is every form of creative expression or pursuit. It doesn't hurt to be wary of the exploitative nature of the platforms we use to promote, connect, and share our creativity. We are in tune with our authentic selves as creatives, it’s a necessity. So, if you are feeling pressure, performative, unsettled, or hollowed out when trying to engage with your creativity it’s important to step back, take a breath, and examine where that pressure to perform is coming from. Once we notice it we have the awareness and therefore the power to begin to change it. How do we engage safely with platforms that do have benefits for creative communities? Is the pressure we feel from external sources and input? If not, if it’s coming from some internal drive to produce and share and show - is that drive passion and generosity or is it rooted in validation and a desire to legitimize yourself and your creativity? 

The Belief in Inspiration or Bust

There is a prevailing myth across all creative communities big and small, business minded and hobbyist, that indicates inspiration, the muse, the divine lightning strike is necessary for creation, and if it doesn’t strike you, if it eludes you, or is blocked from you, then all your effort, energy, and desire is wasted,  bust, a dead end. Being uninspired, sitting in block and mucking around to get through it is a sacred part of the creative journey, and it’s not a one time thing. It’s not a single right of passage, but a recurring inevitability. This is dangerous to creatives because it makes us believe that the embers are useless, only a blazing fire indicates inspiration, progress, passion. It can lead many to starve ideation, quit projects like it’s going out of style, and stagnate in waiting rather than learning. It’s a misguided myth that has evolved from creatives preaching about the sacred practice, the divine intervention, the ephemeral properties of creativity. I am one that enjoys the mystic pieces of creativity. However, creativity is work. It takes patience and persistence and discipline to stick with it and do the thing. Yes it’s a calling, but if I ignore the call, if I wander away from the phone, if I stop trying to call back I lose. I failed. Not because I’m uninspired, but because I left my post, I stopped working waiting for someone else, something else to do the heavy lifting, the starting, the finish. Inspiration is not a grand gesture, it can be quiet and simple. It can look like sitting in the chair and showing up day after day. It can feel exhilarating or anti-climactic. The point is, inspiration is not the key factor in creative motivation. It’s nice, it’s certainly helpful, but it’s not a guarantee and it’s not a necessity. What happens when we let go of the limiting belief of inspiration as a driver in our creative life? How can we reclaim fancy over ourselves and our practice when inspiration is hailed as the pinnacle of creative genius? When we break that wall in our heads that we are a bust when we feel uninspired, what creations may be unleashed that were held at bay waiting for a moment to shine when all they needed was our glance and a breath to shake off the dust? 

Ambition is often held synonymous with productivity and performance. Motivation is held up as an argument against rest and in need of inspiration. The narratives, the myths that surround these concepts keep our motivation from meeting our ambition, and overinflate our ambition to dwarf our motivation. There is nothing magical about these concepts. If you are ambitious, if you want to do the thing, to create, to build it’s actually quite simple. Show up and do. No waiting, no pushing. Create space within your life, within your practice for rest, for breath, for a pause, but always show up to face the blank mind and the stark and startling nothing that may greet you.